One of the worst things about the mental Lyme irrationalness (is that a word?), is that you come to a point where you can no longer trust what you think, or feel. You cannot trust your mind or emotions. It’s so hard because that’s how you analyze everything in life… whether the pan on the stove would be hot to touch, or if that person across from you is upset or not. Every little thing.
How do we know which way is up or which way is down? What is right, and what is wrong? What’s really going on around us?
In a previous post, I wrote about what we do with the irrational lies that Lyme causes sometimes. However, we have to be able to recognize that they are irrational lies in the first place.
There’s actually an answer much simpler than we realize. No, it isn’t perfect, but it can help, and be so relieving. Want to know what it is?
Nope, I don’t mean you have to ask me, I mean that’s the answer: ask.
In the Hunger Games movie Mockingjay Part 2 (I haven’t read the books), *spoiler* Peeta gets tortured with physical pain and his memories get twisted. Suddenly, he doesn’t know what is right, or who to believe. Should he believe those who say that they used to be his friends? How can he know what is right when something different it coming at him from every direction?
Finick gives him the same advice my mom gave me: “Just ask.” Ask those around us that we know and trust. (I suppose that wouldn’t quite work for Peeta since he didn’t trust them, but at least when he asked he could have some information to try and determine the truth of).
Yes, they may not know exactly what is going on in our brains. But they love us. When we verbalize the things in our minds they can help us determine if it’s true and rational or not.
I know that it is often so much easier not to say anything out loud. Often, one of the irrational thoughts in my head is exactly that: that I can’t say it aloud to anyone. But in doing that, I cut myself off from help, from understanding, and from compassion.
In Mockingjay Part 2, Peeta took to stating something in his head, and asking, “Real or not real?” Why can’t we do the same thing? If we ask it in that way, too, it can help our family or those around us realize why we’re asking, so that they can help us.
So ask, “real or not real?”. God doesn’t mean for us to try and fight through everything on our own. He’s given us Himself, His word, and also the people around us.